Engineered furnishings, illustrated by Reza Farazmand

Happy Birthday to Me!

And here's one of my funniest poems, illustrated by the very funny Reza.
Get some chuckles today at his site Poorly Drawn Lines. And read below.


In case the poetry thing doesn’t work out
for me, you’ll be relieved to know I have skills.
I build bookshelves, dressers, closets, cabinets,
and other furniture from prefab pieces.
I am a craftsman of only the finest

particle boards and composites. I have tools,
the complete set: a hammer, and not one but
two screwdrivers. I’ve also amassed some screws
and several Allen wrenches (now safely kept
behind the dryer. If I need them, I’ll get

a magnet and string.) I can read Swedish charts
more or less, and I can construct a brand new
night stand in fewer than four goddamn-fuck-its.
If I start at sunrise, by midafternoon
I’ll have one new shelf and a few new BandAids.

Engineered furnishing. It’s a train: fast, smooth
and streamlined. And I’m the engineer—choo-choo!

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